In this article, dating coach Christopher Isaac is going to explain the psychology of understanding human behavior so you can save time finding Mr. Right. He does this by teaching you how to recognize the 3 signs of a man that is secretly seeing other women on the side or is having thoughts of wanting to be with other women.
Have you ever felt the painful sting of finding out the “great” guy you were in a relationship with was actually seeing other women behind your back? Unfortunately, this is not uncommon for many of the students that I’ve coached.
But until that painful moment, how the hell are you supposed to actually know what’s going on without any hard proof if all the advice you’re getting is centered around, “Don’t be the crazy girlfriend who goes snooping in his phone looking for dirt.” Good question! That’s what you’re going to learn here!
If you’re with a loyal man, who values you then you’ll know based on how much he invests in you.
Because men invest in things they value!
Allow me to give you ladies some perspective… a man will cheat if he values attention and validation from his peers more than intimacy and loyalty from a partner.
A man that values loyalty and intimacy from a partner (loyalty to friends and family don’t count – not a reference) will spend time investing in that woman and the future of his partnership with her.
So what this means for you is that you don’t have to dig into his Facebook account and cellphone looking for signs that he is thinking about someone else, because he will tell unconsciously you based on his behavior.
Pay attention to his actions.
Is he comfortable blowing you off, and ignoring you? Does he hide certain things about himself and bullshit you when confronted about them? Some men will become toxic. They pick fights, start blaming you for things, and make you feel bad just so they can keep the attention off of them when they’re sneaking around. Others, however, become distant and start investing themselves emotionally to other women, which leaves a lack of intimacy and connection in your own relationship.
One very important concept to understand is…
A man may feel like he loves you, but if he stops investing in you then he doesn’t value you.
It’s incredibly important to understand that these are not the same, and you do not need one to have the other, but you sure as hell need both to have a heathy and lasting relationship. The sort of relationship where you and your partner still desire one another.
But what if you get in a relationship with a guy and you’re not sure if he still loves his ex or not? He sure as hell has a reason to lie about that…
Well, if this is the position you’re in, then I’d offer the same advice. Pay attention to how he invests in you and the relationship. If he keeps you at an arm’s length and promises things will change over time it’s probably just his way of saying he can’t be that intimate with you because he’s still emotionally invested in his ex. That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t like you, but that doesn’t mean you should settle for that either.
If those are the signals a man will give when his mind is occupied by other women, then how can you spot the “right” man that we mentioned earlier?
I’m glad you asked…
The man who is truly committed to you builds on your existing relationship, he creates memories, and invests in a future with you in it. His actions tell you this (not his words!). A man with that goal in mind is likely building a stable life for himself to share with someone.
The right man is there to add value to your life, and share that life with a woman who can, in turn, add value to his. The right man won’t settle for a woman who is only interested in taking value, because he values himself. The right man is a man that is emotionally and mentally healthy enough to share that with someone, because he doesn’t need validation from his peers or women – he gets it internally and lacks that social insecurity.